Weaving a Tapestry

So the past few days have been a little harder for me. Listened to the song Tapestry, by Beth Champion Mason (you should listen to it!), as I was driving back to Long Beach tonight, and it was very fitting with how I've been feeling. How I want to be trusting what God is doing in my life. Recognizing how He is using this challenging time to grow and strengthen me, and create something more beautiful in me. Sometimes (like now) it's hard to do that. But I will keep seeking and trying to trust. Rejoicing in the lessons I'm learning, in how my understanding of God's character is growing, and experiencing this deeper expression of His love for me.

Continuing to pray this verse for myself and Daniel as we trust God in this distance:

"But He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me, I will come forth as gold. My feet have closely followed his steps; I have kept to his way without turning aside. I have not departed from the commands of his lips; I have treasured the words of His mouth more than my daily bread." - Job 23:10-12

It Is Well With My Soul

Well, Daniel boarded a plane to East Asia late Thursday night. Leading up to that painful moment when he disappeared from sight with a last wave good-bye until now, a few days since he's been gone, God has been doing such a work in my heart! I can do nothing but fall on my knees in awe and praise of Him, who perfectly is writing the story of my life. So a few lessons..

#1: I have never experienced and known the "peace of God, which transcends all understanding" (Phil. 4:7) as deeply as in this last week. I am so thankful for how God has been guarding my heart and mind in this way. It seems crazy from a worldly perspective, but as we were saying good-bye, I was able to honestly say (albeit through tears) "I'm not scared". And that has continued to be true in these past days. What an amazing gift!

#2: I am so thankful that Jesus has given me life. That I have the Holy Spirit living inside of me, interceding for my on my behalf. I love Romans 8. All of it. The freedom I have to cry out to my Father in weakness. To experience His love that I can never ever be separated from! To truly know that He is working for my good! And seeing that happening already.

#3: Psalm 34 also has many lovely gems. I love that I have been able to "taste and see the the Lord is good" and be blessed by taking refuge in Him. Thankful for His tangible expressions of His love and goodness through my roommates, friends and family. Verses 15 and 17 are also especially powerful to me. "The eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their cry", "The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them". I have found it so powerful to be able to literally cry out to Him, and experience Him loving and comforting me through my tears. That I do not even have to be able to form the words, but He knows what is on my heart, the deepest expressions of my emotions. He knows, and He hears and He cares and He loves me through all of it. I'm reminded of Hannah, in 1 Samuel 1, crying out to the Lord, in bitterness of soul, pouring out her soul to Him. I am thankful for the freedom of that. And that I can cry and grieve, but simultaneously, be so filled with joy and hope and peace!

There is probably more to add, but I think this is good for now :) I get to skype with him in less than an hour! SO excited :)

Oh Lord, may I continue to deepen my trust and hope in You alone. May I cling to the truths of who You are, experiencing the depths of Your love for me. I want to still be singing when the evening comes. Bless the Lord, O my soul.